I was invited to appear on the View this month but declined. I felt a bit uneasy because it’s February and feel-good stories like Jenny’s Heroes aren’t sensational enough for sweeps. They said they just wanted to see what I’m up to but I doubt that, so I declined. Last year, I was also asked to host Jack LaLanne’s infomercial but I’ve been turning down infomercials for years. But wait a minute – he was almost a hundred years old! Were they looking for someone to appeal to his demographic? Did Betty White turn them down? Olivia De Havilland not available?

Then last week, someone called about hosting an infomercial for something called Lifestyle Lift.  Here’s a picture from their website:

Why are they calling me? This is a facelift! Do you suppose I was going to be the new “before” & “after?” What’s next? “Now, here’s Jenny Jones to tell you about the new Ortho-Med Shower Chair!” Should I stock up if Depends go on sale? Maybe my car isn’t the only thing that needs some work but I won’t let this get me down. I still have my teeth.