Let’s just call it what it is.

Bird food. New name? Squirrel food.

You would think a birdhouse hanging on a single wire would keep out these mangy, rat-faced, no-good, low-life, beady-eyed, scum-sucking, bird food-stealing squirrels!

But noooooooooooooo! This was his little private playhouse… until I slammed together two metal pots and he went flying out the side like a frisbee on steroids.  Next time: Mexican jalapeno corn nuts. “Adios, mi amigo. Usted no está bienvenido aqui.”

Goodbye, my flying fuzzy frisbee. Keep flying all the way to Mexico you “sarnoso, rata-encaró, maldito, de los bajos fondos, de ojos pequeños, verdín-chupando, el pájaro ardillas alimento-robando!”