Just when we think some animal species are disappearing, they find a new one. The tube-nosed fruit bat was discovered in the remote mountains of Papua New Guinea. This is not movie special effects – it’s real!

Let me just say that if this thing ever came flying at me, I would immediately check myself in to the nearest neuropsychiatric institute to see if they could hook me up to some electrodes that would permanently remove this hideous bat face from my memory. If that didn’t succeed, I would never recover and just live at the asylum, with my nightmares, for the rest of my life. Can you imagine?

Did you recognize her right away? It was October 1991 when Martha Stewart appeared on “Jenny Jones.” It was my first year on television and that was twenty years ago! Make sure to check out the audience members because about five years later, it was their grandchildren who were coming to my show! Martha and I made potpourri and she took questions from the audience. It’s great fun to see how we all looked back in the day. Martha looks great and I’m in this severe burgundy satin blouse with…..wait a minute…..are those shoulder pads?!? Those can’t be my real shoulders! Either that or my head was a lot smaller then. Click here to watch the video

Long before Donald Trump hired Dionne Warwick to work on The Apprentice,
guess who SHE hired to work with her?

It was almost 25 years ago that I opened for Dionne Warwick in Lake Tahoe.
So I guess we could say I trumped Donald Trump!

Yesterday, Denis said, “You’ve had a busy week this week so I want to take you out tonight, anywhere you want to go.” It’s true, I’ve been helping my stepmom with her affairs, had some repairs done at the house, a new “Hero” on Thursday, and my own stuff to do, so it was a long week. It was sweet of Denis to offer and it didn’t take long for me to decide where I wanted to go. “Take me to Target. That’s where I want to go.” We had dinner at home (marinated pork loin, roasted vegetables, kitchen sink cookies for dessert) and then headed for Target. I was so excited, planning my adventure in the car, including the two shopping carts I would need for all the stuff I was getting, but I needed time. I will not be rushed at Target – this is my night out. My sweetie pie agreed to hang out in the DVD department until I called him and said I was done, no matter how long it took. (how can I still be mad about his eye test?) Anyway, I had the best time. They have one of those shopping cart escalators that takes your cart up to the second floor….so cool! There was hardly anyone there and I covered the whole store in about an hour. I didn’t load up two carts, but I did get a set of measuring spoons and a T-shirt. We came home, I made popcorn, and we watched a movie. Now that was a fun Saturday night!

Here’s a picture of a two-storey Target: (there are several in SoCal)

I know I’ve said a lot of nice things about my man, Denis, but I’m not feeling it right now. It’s always been my responsibility to schedule our health checkups, like annual physicals, teeth cleaning, eye exams, etc., which I do and Denis has always gone as scheduled. But we are now at a standoff and I don’t know what to do. He refuses to go for an eye exam. He hasn’t had one in three years and the worst part is – he made a promise! He promised me last year he would go by Valentine’s Day of this year. And just like everything else, he left it until the last minute and had to go out of town and there was his excuse. Well he’s been back for a month and every time I ask, he says he’ll do it but guess what? He’s not doing it. Here’s everything I’ve tried:
1. I said I would make the appointment so he won’t have to – he said no.
2. I gave him articles saying why it’s important to get annual eye exams. No.
3. I asked him to do it for me for last Christmas – it was the only gift I wanted. No.
4. I asked him to do it for Valentine’s Day and he PROMISED he would. He didn’t.
5. I told him no more hugs until he goes. It didn’t work – I needed a hug yesterday.
6. I stopped making his favorite snack – deviled eggs. So what?
7. I have refused to make my barbeque ribs. No big deal.
8. I tried harassing him every day. Nothing changed.
9. I said, “I don’t care if you never go.” Neither did he.
10. I tried sulking but he thought it was for something else stupid he did.
Anyway, I need advice. He needs to get his eyes checked. How hard can it be? A teeth cleaning is more stressful than an eye test. And doesn’t he have to bend over for a physical? Hey….I almost forgot….he went willingly for his colonoscopy! Twice! And they can’t poke around his eyes???

If you’re a regular visitor, you know Mrs. News (Kathy) is giving back to those facing struggles by crocheting beautiful, colorful “chemo caps” and she donates them to cancer patients going through chemo. How wonderful for people to know that a stranger wants to help. I originally posted a photo of these lovely caps on January 31st and since then, a website visitor (Marsha), who recently started crocheting chemo caps, asked Kathy for, and received, the pattern.  Then today, this message came in: “Hello, I came across this site by accident and saw your beautiful and colorful caps. They’re gorgeous! I would love to purchase a couple for my 18yr old daughter who was recently diagnosed with Ewing Sarcoma cancer in February 2011. She has lost all of her hair. She is in chemo treatment every 2 weeks. She has received many nice caps from generous people but would really enjoy some colorful and bright, spring colors. Thank you for your consideration. Gwen Dela Cruz

Kathy, you are an angel, a role model, and a special kind of “Jenny’s Hero.” Here is the link to Gwen’s daughter, Alexis’ story:

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/alexisdelacruz/mystory

And here is another look at Kathy’s beautiful caps…

UPDATE (April 3rd): Kathy reports that Alexis has received her Chemo Caps and loves them. Kathy says, “That made me feel like I was able to help her smile, at least for a little while. I also included a pair of “funglasses” to make her smile. I am also sending many more to her to pass out at the childrens cancer ward. I wanted to thank you for being the bridge for connecting us!”

The Baron never showed up all weekend.  Why should he? There was nothing for him to eat.

Oh, there was food alright – I put out plenty of seeds & nuts and corn. But somebody crashed our bird party and ate it all. I put more food out – gone again!

I need squirrel ammo. “Ka-pow!!”

Then Baron Von Jonesenheimer III could come back for some squirrel sausage… and I could use a new wallet.

Is it cannibalism to feed hard-boiled eggs to a pheasant? I don’t think so.  It wasn’t a pheasant egg, it was a chicken egg. We feed beef to dogs. A cow is to a dog as a pheasant is to a chicken, n’est pas? Seriously, they say to feed hard-boiled eggs to pheasants. Here’s the page from the pheasant and peafowl website:

http://www.gbwf.org/pheasants/pheasant_diets.html

I still say Baron’s got a bad attitude. Pheasants are starving in China.