I went to THREE dentists today! I started with my regular dentist for a tooth that was very painful to the touch and forget about eating on that side. I was pretty sure I had an infection. She took an x-ray and said it didn’t look like an infection but it could need a root canal, or maybe it’s a gum/bone problem. “It’s hard to say.” Meantime, I’m in pain but don’t like to take medication. So she called the root canal guy who agreed to see me right away. I asked if I should take my x-ray with me and she said, “I already emailed it to him.” Wow. The last time I needed dental work, they clipped my x-ray to a lighted screen and it was the size of a postage stamp. I headed for dentist #2 who took some kind of 180 scan photo and then started poking around but I was in pain so he offered to numb the area. I made the mistake of opening my eyes and seeing the needle before it went in. I’ll never do that again! He numbed the area (so he said) and then started shoving a sharp metal ice pick into my gums. Okay, it may have been a thin dental probe but com’on! I could still feel it! It must have been two feet long! What’s the point of that anyway? Then I asked if I could rinse….. and I saw blood!!!

“You don’t need a root canal,” he said, “but you have to see the gum guy.” He didn’t call him the gum guy but I left and headed for the third dentist. On the way, the numbing stopped working and now came some serious pain, from the damage done by the ice pick. When I got to the third office, I was in severe pain. I must have looked bad because they gave me 4 Advil and 2 Tylenol all at once. With no food. Before the pills kicked in, I was in chair #3 and out came the ice pick again. He started with the poking and the prodding and I pushed his hand away. “Can you give me some topical stuff for pain before you go mining in there?” He offered another numbing by needle and much as I hate needles, it was a relief. Go for it. It can’t hurt any more than this pain I’m having now. So I got another injection (so it seemed) until the prod came out. Maybe they should wait a little longer for the numbing to work – just a thought. There was more sharp, jolting pain and when he was done he said, “You don’t need gum surgery. There may be a crack in the root but it’s hard to say.” He suggested I have the infection cleaned out for starters and see if it heals up on its own. I’m going back Thursday.

Finally, I was able to drive home.  The pills kicked it and the pain was gone… but I was high! With no food, the pills made me dizzy and I was afraid I’d get a DUI. So I pulled over, found some almonds in my purse and ate them, on my good side, the side that wasn’t numb.  My bad side was still numb but I managed to get home and couldn’t wait to have some green tea and relax.  I made a cup of tea, sat down, sipped my tea, and it all spilled down my face and onto my clothes. I guess you’re supposed to wait for the numbness to be gone. Who cares? I think I’m still high.

This is a number I never expected to reach. The new total after today’s pick is 7,008! I used to joke about still picking tomatoes on Christmas Day but that’s exactly what’s going to happen. There are still hundreds of green ones but guess what? There are new branches still popping up with yellow flowers, waiting to become even more tomatoes. I’m tired. I think I hate tomato soup now. People are avoiding me, afraid I’ll show up with another bag of tomatoes. “Here comes Farmer Jones again with another sack. Quick! Lights off, shades down, nobody’s home.”

I was walking through the house today and spotted this thing on the floor which at first I thought was just some debris so I kept walking. Then I decided to take a second look. What is that? I bent over to look at it and couldn’t decide if it was a bug or not. I put on my glasses to get a better look and still couldn’t tell. The magnifying glass was next, with my glasses, on my knees (but not too close) but I still couldn’t be sure. Was it a walking stick? They blend into trees and sticks and this one was camouflaged to match my floor. It wasn’t moving but I was still afraid to walk away so I put a glass over it for Denis to deal with. When he came home he told me it was a grape stem but I think he was lying not to freak me out. He found a scorpion in the house once and never told me so his credibility is clearly questionable. He knew I would have wanted to move. So what was that? I still think it was something but I’ll never be sure…

No matter how you pronounce it, I sure have a lot. Here’s the latest on my monster cherry tomato plant:

I picked 98 yesterday and 91 today.

The new total is 6,432 and I’m pretty sure it will reach 7,000.

Here it is today.

There is definitely a contest coming!

“Let’s go see Book of Mormon,” I said.

“It’s playing at the Pantages in Hollywood,” I said.

“Let’s go Halloween night,” I said. “No one goes to the theater on Halloween.”

“Com’on! It’ll be fun. All the Halloween craziness will be down on Santa Monica.”

“Puhleeeeze? I promise, it’s not a mistake to go to Hollywood on Halloween night.”

“No, we have to go. I already got the tickets.”

“Don’t worry. Traffic will be fine. You’ll thank me later.”

“Stop worrying. What could go wrong?”

I didn’t feel a thing.

But two earthquakes in one day?

The closest one was around 8 this morning and I was still asleep. It was a 3.9 with five aftershocks.

The other one hit overnight last night but it was farther away. I can’t complain about these minor earthquakes when Hurricane Sandy is headed for the east coast at the same time. They are predicting it with such precision but I’m still hoping that winds may change and it won’t be the “perfect storm” that appears to be looming. We can only hope.

I actually like grocery shopping. Now that I’m not on TV, I come and go to the grocery store and Whole Foods, enjoying the fact that no one recognizes me, allowing me to go out in sweat pants, a pony tail, and no makeup. I look more like someone who works for a celebrity. So last week I went to my regular Whole Foods and as I was checking out, the checker says to me, “You’re buying more today than you usually do.” I’ve shopped there for years but was surprised that she would remember a customer’s buying habits. “You actually remember what your customers buy?” I asked. “Oh,” she said, “when a celebrity comes in, I usually remember.” Say what??? But I’m not famous any more! There are no makeup & hair people at my house! I come in here and none of the staff even glances at me! It was shocking because all this time, I thought I was invisible there. I guess I was living in denial. I suddenly realized that anyone with a cell phone could take my picture and I could find myself featured  in “Stars Without Makeup,” or they would create a new section just for me called “Stars Without Mirrors.”

I started looking over my shoulder when she stunned me even more. “When a celebrity shops here, people always want to know what they bought.” Com’on! Are you serious? So now I have to edit my shopping list? AND comb my hair? The checker assured me she never tells people what celebs are buying but what about all the other checkers? And the other Whole Foods? And grocery stores? And oh the horrors… the drug store! Can I ever buy red vines again? Hair remover? An enema? I don’t think so.